• Nicole Rungo

How to shape yourself as a young woman of integrity

Updated: Aug 19, 2021

Woman of Integrity

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According to Wikipedia, integrity is the practice of being honest and showing consistent and uncompromising adherence to strong moral and ethical principles and values. In ethics, integrity is regarded as the honesty and truthfulness or accuracy of one's actions.

In my understanding, integrity is a state of being whole and your true self without wavering in different circumstances.

Simply saying, it’s not being a two-faced woman.

Speaking for myself, I love this trait for it’s how I want to be; someone that doesn’t change who she is because she is talking to different people or addressing different matters.

To be honest, I have had my struggles keeping a single face, especially when I used to be so determined in having so many people liking me.

I used to be mesmerised by people who didn’t really present a great character, and that was mostly because they were either popular or well-known. I wanted to fit in so bad that I would disregard my morals and principles to appear like one of them.

Safe to say that I was shredding who I truly was to be someone who I really didn’t like.

After much growth and maturity, thanks to the Lord, I have grown back to build the woman I want to become and will be proud of, and that is a woman of integrity (amongst other things).

Being a woman of integrity isn’t as breezy as I thought it would be. It requires a lot of self-discovery, practice, patience and so much more. So much damn more.

To become a woman of integrity, you need to know what makes you whole.

What makes you you?

There are many things that make you the young woman that you are.

Your social interactions, your relationships, your mind, body, heart and spirit, and others.

Looking back on the definition of integrity, to possess such term, a person needs to present consistent and unwavering adherence of strong morals, ethical principles and values.

That said, we are going to talk about those three terms and one extra one.

Your beliefs

Your beliefs are basically thoughts, ideas and reality that you hold true, sometimes without proof of such realities or thoughts.

For instance, I strongly believe that there is a God that made everything that is in and around this world and that He came to die for our sins.

That’s one of my strong beliefs; actually, my strongest belief.

I have a bunch of others like how the earth is roundish and not flat. (Don't come at me, flat earth believers).

As for my beliefs, I should always stick to them if I truly believe in them.

I would be a woman who lacks integrity if I encounter an atheist and, for the sake of making a ‘good’ first impression, agree that there’s no such thing as a God that made everything we know to exit and beyond that.

Even if I am to lose my life, I will stick with that belief.

God made everything. P E R I O D.

Your values

Your values are pretty much the things that help you in how to live your life. They can include concepts such as honesty, responsibility and love.

They influence the way you behave, communicate and interact with others, and yourself to a certain extent.

Value sometimes come from our beliefs.

Just how I value honesty, humility and love (amongst) others for I believe in a Lord that gives me all of that, and that helped me see how those concepts are so important.

Some of the other values that help me live my version of an ideal life are:






Personal Growth (duh)


These are some of the concepts that help shape who I am and how I go about my life.

I need to be creative in every aspect of my life, respect others and myself no matter what, live a simple life and go for a simple approach whenever possible.

I always seek ways of growing, the Bible and God helping me a lot in that area, and strengthening my faith because it keeps me strong and happy.

Those are some of the values that make me who I am and pave the way for the person that I wanna become.

Your morals

Morals are pretty much a system of beliefs that help you decide what’s good and what’s bad.

They help you distinguish what is good from what's bad, and to keep you in line with those beliefs.

Some of my morals are:

To always go for the truth

To avoid judging others

To be respectful of the different beliefs

Abortion is murder.

Those are some of my moral beliefs and they help me to see what’s wrong and what’s right for me.

When it comes to integrity, I shouldn’t go against them for those are part of who I am, otherwise, I’m contradicting who I am. I'm betraying myself.

Your principles

Your principles are pretty much rules or even values that you have to follow in order to live the life you find ideal for yourself, to be the person you want to be.

Principles and values can be mistaken for another, but thanks to Stephen R. Covey and his book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, we can see where they differ.

While values are personal, subjective and may change (probably because of some changes in your beliefs), principles are rules and laws that are permanent, unchanging and universal in time.

My principles are honesty, integrity and love, amongst others and will never change.

I may change my values but as long as those are in line with who I am or want to be, I’m still holding on to my integrity and being honest to myself.

So your values and principles might be the same, just like how I value love and one of my life principles is to love everyone.

Just make sure you have those “values” or rules that never change.

I value the relationship I have with God and one of my principles is to live accordingly to God’s laws.

That won’t change. I will forever be thriving to live the way God wants me to live for that’s the best way to live, for me.

Let’s wrap this up

Being a woman of integrity means being consistent with and sincere about your true character, never pretending to be something you are not and not wavering in different circumstances.

To be a woman of integrity is to be whole, complete, and true to yourself.

A woman of integrity is true to herself when she has a firm grip on what makes her who she is. When she has a firm grip on her beliefs, values, morals and principles — all that stands true to her and makes her who she is.

Out there, many might see integrity in different lights, but I see it as being someone who stands true to who they truly are and doesn’t change in different settings.

My role model for integrity is God. He never changes — the same yesterday, today and tomorrow — and His character is consistent.

The same God that was there at the beginning of everything will be there at the end, and the new beginning, of everything.

That’s how I want to be. The same character throughout my life, even after going through tremendous growth (there’s always room for more growth).

To be a woman of integrity doesn’t mean that you don’t grow, and change in a way. It means that you grow into a better version of yourself, the one those beliefs, values, morals and principles were founding.

Remember that you can still be true to who you are and grow, as long as you grow into the woman you truly want to be.

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